Realizing you were wrong January 2, 2007

It’s no secret that I’m unsure of my relationship.  I really don’t know if this is the guy that I am willing to spend the rest of my life with.  I don’t know if there is ANY guy that I would feel that way about.  I’m sure it causes me to put undue pressure on [...]

Forgotten emotions November 27, 2006

Sometimes I hate dreams.  They can feel so real and awake emotions that would be better off dormant.  They can remind you of feelings that you’d long forgotten. 
Last night I had a dream about P.  It’s been about 2 and a half years since we were together and for the most part, I can say [...]

Trade-off November 21, 2006

Things are different now.  It might just be temporary, but I hope not.  I’m feeling like I don’t want to be without him… ever.  He’s making the effort – every day, in every area of our relationship.  I feel like he really loves me and wants to make me happy. 
He holds my hand when we [...]

Messed up October 20, 2006

I don’t think he’ll ever walk away from me.  I’m not sure why.  I don’t think I deserve his loyalty because I have not been so loyal.  I’ve been willing to walk away more than once.  They weren’t threats.  I wasn’t bluffing.  Maybe that’s why he’s never doubted me – he can tell I’ve been [...]